Proverbs 22:6
Can I pour out my heart for a minute?
As a rookie in the parenting department, this verse has been on my mind ALOT lately. Kendall is still little and is just starting to recognize and learn. Our number one job as parents will be to train her. We are still figuring out what this training will look like in our home.
Leading her to Christ is the ultimate goal. Not only to salvation but to the knowledge that you can live a satisfied life while serving God and trusting 100% in his word. Even more than just the knowledge of these facts, but a desire to fulfill these.
In the Jones' house we do believe in discipline, even more specific spanking, gasp, quick call DCS. And although I can see how training and discipline run hand and hand, I'm talking about specifically about training.
While I was pregnant I read the highly controversial book, To Train Up a Child. I remember having mixed opinions. Some of the ideas from the book I thought were great. A few of the them I remember thinking they were to harsh for our family. I really need to reread it because I can't specifically remember many of the details.
Although, Michael is the head of our home, as a stay at home mom a lot of the training will be left at to me. I have several thoughts and ideas but they are all unproven. And I know better than to blog that I'll be doing this and that, only to discover later that this and that aren't so cool. :)
So my question to my dear bloggy friends...what "training" did you do (or are currently doing) with your kids? I would love to hear what was effective and not. I would love to hear from older and young moms and everyone in between. It's time to come out of the wood works. Even if you have never commented before, I'd love it if you'd take 2 minutes to do so, then you can go back into hiding.
Maybe I can do an update post next week with your suggestions. :) I can wait to gain from others experiences.
3 comments:
Oh, girl. I hate to tell you, but every bit the training done here is STILL unproven because we are still raising our children. Everything we go through with Aubree, our oldest, is the first time we've EVER been through it AT ALL. I also read To Train Up a Child. I'm like you. I liked some of the ideas, but I remember being repulsed at the thought of anyone hosing their kid off outside in November just because they are 3 and still not potty trained. Now mind you, all my kids were trained no later than 30 months, so I don't know what it's like to be desperate when potty training. I know, for us, we always feel different about ourselves and our techniques in front of different people. I'm just being honest. Some ppl seem to have horrible kids, and we feel like we are pros when around them. LOL Then others we get around put us to shame and make us realize places that we still need to work on. As far as training, I worked hard on the yes sir, no sir, yes ma'am, no ma'am, please, thank you, staying SEATED during eating time, cleaning your own messes because YOU made it, being respectful to others and their feelings, make your bed each day, clean your room every evening before bed, clean your space at the table, etc. Even though we still still A LOT of areas where our kids need improvement, we are always humbled at all the compliments we get on our kids' behavior and manners when out in public. Kids thrive with a mom and dad present, and I have no doubt they will have that with you and Michael. You will get a million different pieces of advice from a million different people. There's nothing wrong with asking for advice/opinions/help, but in the end it's between you, your husband, and God how you handle things. I find consistent hand swatting in conjunction with a firm NO in the beginning works great. You get some pitiful pucker lips that will make you want to apologize, but it starts working and you realize it's best that your child learns the word no for your own sanity and his/her safety! :) Love ya!
First decide what characteristics are important to your husband and you. I wanted polite, happy and children that did not tear apart someone's house in 5 seconds. The most important thing is you also have to model this behavior because they learn what they live. I started with discipline as soon as they were born. No I didn't spank a new born. But when they would grab something on the change table I would take it from them and tell them no etc. Respect of the child equals respect to the parents. My girls are now 22 and 20 and I have never looked through their things in there room or purses. They learned very early to put away their toys because we made it a game, see who can pick up the most, throw the toys into the basket from a distance etc. Of course each child is different because God made them that way. My oldest was very quiet, like to sit back and study things, enjoyed being by herself. My youngest was in your face, boisterous and had to be the center of attention.
Be diligent and consistent. Discipline requires effort and hard work. Sometimes you feel tired, especially with multiple children, and may tend to just let things go, but put forth the extra effort to accomplish what needs to be done. I have no doubt you will do a great job!
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